Mr. Carter Man

Written by on March 14, 2014

There are few events in your life where you remember EVERYTHING.  One of those rare times for me was when my nephew Carter was born.  It was five years ago on Monday, St. Patrick’s Day.  I remember what I was wearing.  I remember the 24-hours leading up to it.  I remember what the air smelled like. 

I was about to become an auntie for the first time and I was beside myself with lots of different emotions.  Happy because … well … I was going to be an auntie … and terrified because Carter was diagnosed inutero with a Congenital Heart Defect called Tetralogy of Fallot with Absent Pulminary Valve.  We would also learn of other complications and issues that would finally lead to his 99 day hospital stay complete with seven surgeries – one while he was the ripe ol’ age of six days.  This little boy captured my entire heart immediately and my life was never the same.  When I was at the anatomy scan for my own son three years later, I asked the doctor to explain to me what my sister was looking at during Carter’s anatomy scan and that’s when my heart sunk and the tears fell.  My little guy had to fight so hard because his tiny little heart just wasn’t put together the correct way. 

So here we are five years later.  Every year I’m reminded of his bravery and hope someday he’ll truly know how much he has changed every person in our family for the good.  In his first birthday card, I wrote him an auntie Netty poem.  I hadn’t looked at it in forever, but all of these words still hold every ounce of power that they did when I first wrote them. 

~~To Be You
On the day I was told you were on your way
I smiled and thought what a beautiful day
On the day I was told you were a boy
I couldn’t help but express my joy
On the day I was told you might have a rough go
I believed you’d be fine and give ‘em a show
On the day I realized you’d have to fight
I cried myself into the night
On the day I first saw your beautiful face
I wanted to stay forever in that very place
On the day I got to touch your cheek
I fell in love and my knees were weak
On the day I first held you in my arms
I got a glimpse of all your charm
On the day I first heard your voice
I gave you my heart, I had no choice
On the day you came home to stay
I praised the Lord in every way
Now every single day is new
And you’re the focus through and through
I love you for your huge, brown eyes
I love you for your smile, so wise
I love you for always grabbing my nose
I love you for always grabbing your toes
May rainbows and unicorns dance in your dreams
May your beautiful soul learn to fly
May you always feel the love around you
May you see everything and try …
To be brave
To be strong
To be wise
To be you

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